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09/09/2006
Buzzword-itis
I'm not sure how it got started, but I think it's about time that companies stopped using impressive-sounding (yet meaningless) buzzwords when they talk about themselves. Instead, they should just say what they do. Be blunt, for heaven's sake. I shouldn't have to read through paragraphs of mission statement, goals, values, vision, etc., only to find that at the end, the only things making sense were the words "the", "and" and "is". I swear, if I ever see the words "value-added", "paradigm", "outside the box", or "innovative" (or its derivatives) one more time, I'm going to scream. "Value-added" is the one I hate the most. I originally thought there must be some other meaning to it, but apparently, something that's value-added means it's had value added to it. Oh, how clever. Where's a punching bag?
I'm not sure if the dot-com bubble led to out-of-control buzzword use, as an army of cloned vapourware companies all tried to one-up each other. Whatever the case, I think the single-best thing a company could do these days is dispense with the fluffy vocabulary and just say, "We produce software that does [whatever]." As the old adage goes for creative writers, show, don't tell! Don't say you're innovative or value-added - just show us what you do and we'll decide for ourselves. And if you're not that innovative, put your energy into making your product better, rather than wasting your resources on refining smoke-and-mirrors talk that never made sense in the first place.
The same goes for job descriptions. I think I ranted about this earlier. Companies, you might as well leave out the requirement that your potential employee be brilliant and a hard worker. I mean, that's what everyone wants. Nobody will ever advertise that they want someone who's a lazy bum with the IQ of a tree. I'd like to see what it is that makes your position (and your company) unique and interesting. And, of course, I mean you should describe, not just say "Our company has a unique and interesting job for you!" One step up might be: "Photocopy like never before! Sharpen your boss' pencils with the ancient lost art of Japanese pencil-sharpening! Make coffee in the Mayan tradition - grind it yourself, by hand, before everyone else gets to the office, using fresh rainwater that you stood outside collecting all night!". The best option, of course, is to have a job that is actually (*gasp*) interesting for your employees, no matter how recently they left school. :-)
One can only hope!
01:20 Posted in Job Hunting | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this